Adopting Out of Birth Order
Birth order is important and the decision to disrupt birth order through adoption should not be taken lightly. Families that already have children that are interested in adopting older kids and siblings groups are often faced with the decision of whether to disrupt the order of children in their family.
Many adoption professionals in the past and now routinely advised against this practice, but that may be changing.
As renowned adoption expert Dr. David Brodzinsky said in an interview on a Creating a Family show on disrupting birth order in adoption, “When talking about adopting out of birth order, it is best to throw ‘always’ and ‘never’ out the window, and replace them with ‘sometimes’.” Adopting out of birth order is neither always a good idea or never a good idea; it is sometimes a good idea.
Adopting out of birth order can sometimes result in children being very close in age, in essence creating “artificial twins”. Issues of creating artificial twins are discussed on other resource pages on this site.
Creating a Family has many resources for those considering adopting out of birth order or living the experience. A few we think you will find particularly helpful are:
- Rules of Thumb When Disrupting Birth Order (article)
- Tips to Prepare Children for the Adoption of a Sibling (article)
- How Does Adoption Affect the Siblings Already in the Family? (1 hr. podcast w/ expert)
- Preparing Kids Already in the Home for an Adoption (1 hr. podcast w/ experts)
- Disrupting Birth Order in Adoption and Foster Care (1 hr. podcast w/ expert)
- Disrupting Birth Order Through Adoption (7-minute video)
Many more Creating a Family interviews with experts, blogs, and fact sheets on adopting out of birth order can be found at the icons below.
Sources: Creating a Family radio shows below
Image credit: Andrew Nourse